It’s been three years since I’ve posted

I found you again WordPress ! I will admit I forgot you exsisted … and for someone who claimed to be giving relationship advice, forgetting a loving partner seems ill fitting of me.

Anyhow it is amazing what kind of things I posted at just 15, speaking like I had seen the world in depth through wise eyes. I suppose I have always felt much older than my actual age, and this only came through experiencing things a little too fast  and too much.

But nevertheless I have become  a stronger person from it and have learned how to say no to people and that I don’t need the approving attention of every person I meet or … see. It’s refreshing to not give a fuck if someone I meet likes me or not because of how I styled my hair or applied eye makeup (seriously thought these things would score me a partner, back in the day). I am blunt, I am real and human, and if someone doesn’t like it well goddam these plenty of other people out there, you don’t have to impress every single one !

Advertisements

If you feel uncomfortable having sex with someone, don’t do it!

I’m a big believer in following your gut feeling It applies with a lot of things, if a person or situation makes you uncomfortable don’t or try not to expose yourself to them or it.

Don’t ever let anyone convince you to have sex with them, you aren’t sure or feel uncomfortable. The problem with just “doing it” pbecause, is that you are most likely to regret it the next day.

Make sure you feel right about what you are doing, always! Stop having meaningless sex that you don’t really want, make them wait, make them work for you and not only will your self esteem and self respect be better, but other people will respect you more.

After all nothing is worse than uncomfortable sex where you are trying to cover up your jubbly bits and don’t know why you are even doing it.

That one friend you hate but never get rid of

I’m guessing there’s quite a few of us that have friend who’s maybe a little to clingy or rude or irritating but we are still friends with them. These are the kind of people that their presence brings you down, it might make you annoyed, angry, sad usually not a positive experience being around them. BUT WE ARE STILL FRIENDS WITH THEM.

You can’t be mean and tell them the way they are acting is unacceptable, you haven’t got the courage to just cut them off. I’m here to tell you yes you can and it’s time.

Don’t just keep them in your life because you are too scared to confront them. No no no. It is time to speak up. You may not realise it but that person is actually bringing you down more the you think. Your subconscious is making you to feel bad because 1. You are being around negative energy. 2. You are letting someone who doesn’t deserve you as a friend, have you as a friend. 3. You aren’t taking part in a healthy friendship.

You don’t realise but inside all these thought processes are happening and it is dragging you down.

So how do you get a negative person out of your life?

1. Slowly slowly: you don’t have to be abrupt or mean about it, ease away from them slowly.
2. They are friends with your friends: this does not mean you have to be friends with them. Grow closer to the people you like, push out the bad ones.
3. Unhappy with a large majority of your friend circle: it’s time for a change then, slowly start mixing you a new crowd. But still talk the old friend circle and stay in contact with the ones you liked.
4.tell them: so this is the most blunt approach, it might be as simple as raising some of the issues with the person or people. Don’t be rude or aggressive, just tell it how it is and doesn’t have to be face to face.

Once you start to move away, talk to that person less you will notice a difference. Life’s to short to put up with negative people. Once you surround yourself with the people you like the most and who treat the best you will feel better and raise your self esteem.

Go go go !!

Lets talk ‘daddy issues’

How to know if you have daddy issues? 

  • Do you seek the attention of older men?
  • Are you very needy in a relationship?
  • Do you often feel lost or very lonely without that person near?
  • Do you hate being alone?
  • Are you overly dramatic in your relationship?
  • Do you excessively want to be shown attention or cared for?
  • Are you very submissive to your partner?

What are daddy issues?

Generally, yes. Most-often the issues are usually a lack of affection, which this woman then tries to find in that of an older male to prove to herself that she can, indeed, gain the wanted affection, and it usually develops into a sexual relationship. Generally, daddy issues implies that a female remains incomplete and seeks some sort of fatherly or familial relationship with mates. It makes a woman feel more confident to have the approval of a strong male in their life, so “Daddy issues” can directly stem from inferior self-confidence in a female.

What should you do?

  • Talk it out with your partner if it is conflicting your relationship.
  • Tell a professional. It never hurts to take to a counsellor, you need to come to terms with what you are feeling and how you are acting.
  • Write it out. Write a diary, letter, blog post whatever you like discussing issues you had or still have with your fatherly figure that is causing this problem.
  • If you can talk to your fatherly figure, its never to late to tell him how you feel.

 

To get over someone, you need to find someone else is bullshit

Ok so we have most likely all been told at some point or another that when we when are trying to get over a person we should start seeing a new person.

I would just like to fix that little peice of advice: it will help you to get over a person if you find someone better but don’t you dare just settle for the first train wreck of a human that offers themself to you.

I had this idea that to fill the hole that someone left the only way was with someone new. But what if that someone new fucking sucks. Suddenly I was in this never ending spiral, I would date anything that came along because I thought it would help but it was always disappointing and just made me miss the original person more.
Stupid little flings with meaningless people will just make you feel empty and lonely in your already fragile state.
So don’t listen to that piece of shit advice someone gives you because they don’t know what to say. Surround yourself with good people, talk it out, write it out, run it out. Whatever self healing you decide, just don’t whatever you do join me on the endless loop of dating shitty people to fix yourself. It’s a hard one to get out of.

Stop settling for less

List of shitty thins to stop settling for:

1. Shitty friends (even if it’s been two, three, ten years don’t let the people you surround yourself with drag you down)
2. Shitty relationships (just because he says he likes you doesn’t mean it’s your obligation to see him)
3. Shitty jobs (Your job should make you feel something more, hopefully positive at the end of the day)
4. Shitty marks (argue your point when you feel you deserve better)
5. Shitty food (treat your body to good foods you will feel the difference so fast)
6. Shitty words (don’t let the insults and the critics bring you down, fuck em’)
7. Shitty feelings (of you feel overwhelming sad or stressed or tierd or unsatisfied often don’t settle for it ! Seek help talk to someone. Push out those negative feelings)
8. Shitty influences (don’t sit on tumblr looking at pretty people or cry over more successful people, make sure you are leaning towards influences that will help you create a better you.)